she was so not down for the gang bang
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
