This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
