He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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