This dress was meant to end up on your floor
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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