If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
