i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize