Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
