I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
