on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
