can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
