They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
