Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
only if we run a train.
done.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
