are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Randomize
