But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
you win again, gameday.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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