What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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