I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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