You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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