So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
