Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
