I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
