I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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