He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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