You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
