the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
