I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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