Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
