laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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