we have officially lost it.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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