it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize