I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
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