Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Randomize
