you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize