We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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