Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize