just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
so explain again why im purple
no
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
