brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
