when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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