I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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