im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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