You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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