All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I need a beard to bite.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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