you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We have so much sex to catch up on
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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