Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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