Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
