did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
