Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
