Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
