I should be sponsored by Trojan
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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