Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
