Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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