The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
